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Archives from 12/30/00 --- |
- My pubic hair is very long, about 4 inches actually. Is
that normal?
- Jaime, Age 19
Sure... if you're part horse. Did you ever meet your dad, or did
you're mom "not like to talk about him"? (kidding) Okay. In the
interest of answering your question I'm going to take the highly
unusual and patriotic step of harvesting a few of my own little
curly troops. (pluck OUCH! pluck OW!!
pluck UGH!) Okay (whew!!). I've got them in a row
right here on my desk. Now, I'm going to check them out with my
handy dandy pecker-hair ruler and.... 2 inches. (Keep in mind,
ladies, that's just the HAIR I'm measuring. The unit they
come with is muuuuuuuch longer.) So, Jaime, you've got me beat by
a solid 100%. Of course I did the 'ol trim job on my crop a couple
of months ago so it may be they were longer before and haven't
completely grown back yet. I suggest you get yourself a good pair
of beard clippers and have a little private party. Don't go too
short, though. It can itch something awful!
- The Man
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- I've been dating this guy for a
while and we just recently had sex. I had no idea before hand
that he had a VERY small penis. I never thought that I was one
of those girls that is all consumed with the size of their
boyfriend's penis but I just don't know if I can have satisfying
sex with a man his size. Any suggestions??
- Cassandra, Age 20
Suggestions? How about giving it the ol' college try before you
throw the baby out with the bathwater. Remember that while sex
is important, it's not the MOST important thing. I have an email
here from a 17 year old that's complaining sex with her fiancée
of 4 months is no longer as good as it was. I'd hate to be stuck
with that. If she's already complaining 4 month into things,
imagine how long that marriage is going to last. Try to keep
your eye on the ball when you swing. Marriage is about
commitment. Sex is eventually going to get boring and routine
anyway, so you better have more then just that to rely on.
- The Man
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- If you are only 14 years old,
but in love, why should you wait to have sex?
- Laura, Age 14
Because when you're 14 1/2 years old and pregnant and/or
have crabs and/or are no longer in love with the same boy (who's
going around school telling everyone how you gave him a blow job
and had sex with him), you're going to be very sorry you didn't
wait until you were older. The point is: lots of bad things can
happen AFTER you have sex. At 14 you might not know how to
handle all the bad things that come as a result. As a matter of
fact, having sex when you're 14 is like driving drunk. If you
make home without anything bad happening, you're really, really
lucky.
- The Man
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- I am a closet bisexual male,
and my girlfriend of a year caught me jacking off to a picture
of her ex boyfriend, who was very attractive! She now thinks I'm
some kind of pervert, and hasn't talked to me in a week! What
should I do, I really like her, but I gave into temptation- I
mean I haven't touched a man in a year. Please help.
- Robbie, Age 22
Ouch. You're busted, I guess. Most girls don't like to find out
their men are bisexual. I think the best thing you can do at
this point is tell her the truth as you've told me: You're bi
and you didn't think you could tell her. Plain and simple.
There's no dancing around this one. If she's not cool with it,
there really isn't much you're going to be able to do at that
point. You're going to have to move on. People don't all of a
sudden go from 'grossed out by bisexual boyfriend' to 'okay with
the fact they have a bisexual boyfriend'. Know what I mean?
- The Man
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- Did you
know The Answer Man can now be listened to in MP3 format? It
takes about 10 minutes to download each episode.
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- I have a niece who has a 13
year old daughter. My niece is a single mother. She has to work
two jobs. The daughter is alone much of the time. She dresses
like a 20 year old and keeps Mary Kay in business with all her
makeup. We think the child is going headlong into some serious
trouble. Her mother doesn't think so. What do you think?
- Mary, Age 58
Depends on the kid. Lots of young girls wear makeup and dress
like they're 20. I'd like to know how she feels about school.
Does she have dreams of college? Has anyone talked to her about
pregnancy and AIDS? Drinking and/or drinking and driving? When
you talk to her, do you feel like you're reaching her, or do you
feel like you're in two different worlds? If you want her to
turn out okay, you need to be able to communicate with her and
you need to understand how she communicates with you. It really
only takes one person to make a difference in someone's life.
Keep in mind, everyone makes mistakes, and so will she. God
knows I screwed up something awful when I was younger. I just
never got caught. I think you should focus on what she does
after she fucks up. If she understands her errors and doesn't
repeat them, if she's smart enough to acknowledge her errors, if
you can communicate together well, then I'd say she's going to
be okay.
- The Man
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- I have noticed that I have a
slight odor...you know where. I am so self-conscious of it to
the point that if I'm with a guy, I won't let him go down on me.
I know that they wouldn't say anything to me about it, but it
scares me that it is a turn off. From a guy's point of view, is
mild odor normal?
- MaKayla, Age 19
Hmmm. Have you tried putting a little dab of perfume on the
inside of your thigh? Might help you feel more comfortable. The
real test for you is to let your dude head down there and see if
he returns the next time, I guess. Frankly, you can't go through
life not letting guys have fun down there. That's a lose-lose
situation. You might as well just grin and bear it. One other
quick thought - it might not be as bad as you think it is. Often
we make things out to be bigger than they really are when it
comes to self evaluation. Maybe you're just catching yourself at
'bad times'? Last week some guy wrote to me about having
man-boobs. He was so self conscious he wouldn't even go
swimming.
- The Man
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- I don't know if you can help me
or not. But I like this guy named Travis, Right? And I was just
wondering how you can tell if a guy likes you? And after you can
tell how would you approach a guy to ask him out?
- Danielle
There really is no way to tell if a guy likes you. The younger
the guy, the harder it is to tell. [Young] guys lie, cheat and
steal to get sex or any part of sex. The best thing you can do
is to NOT do anything with him for a very long time. I suggest 6
months. If you're younger then 17 or 18 then I'd of course not
do anything anyway. If he likes you, then he'll still be around.
He can have his reward at that point. If you have sex after just
a month or two then you'll find out - the hard way if he stops
calling you afterwards, and you'll risk not having his respect.
- The Man
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- My boyfriend and I got back
together. I have been trying very hard to make things work. I
don't argue when he goes out with his friends, but now that's
all he does. I'm never invited to go. He makes plans to see me
and then he makes other plans with his friends and blows me off.
He just says, "sorry plans sorta changed". He says he
loves me and we have been through a lot, but I'm so confused.
What do you thinks going on?
- Amy, Age 20
I think you're a young couple with better things to do then
spend all your time together - at least he thinks so. If he's
more interested in spending time with his friends, then
evidently you're not the most important thing to him right now.
I'm not surprised by this. There's a great big world out there,
and being 20 is just starting to explore it. Life really didn't
even start for me until I was 24 and had graduated college (I
was on the 6 year plan for lazy students). Maybe this guy IS the
right guy for you and maybe he isn't, but here's the thing:
right now you seem to want different things out of life. You
want to be with him and he wants to have fun with his buddies.
Maybe you should take another break and see how things are with
him in a couple of years...
- The Man
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- Last weekend my boyfriend
wanted to have anal sex. I said no. I don't think it would be
pleasurable for me, and I don't understand why guys like it. It
seems so gross, won't they get shit on their penis? It's pretty
unsanitary.
- Justine, Age 18
It's kind of a turn on, but don't let it worry you. It's usually
not one of those things people get dumped over. On the other
hand, you might find out that you like it. Stranger things have
happened.
- The Man
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- When ever I see guys on the
toilet doing their business, it turns me on. Is there anything
wrong with that?
- Jane, Age 17
What exactly do you mean "when ever you see...?" How
often do you 'accidentally' see dudes on the can? Have you been
renting movies out of the 'freaky deaky' isle down at the
corner Blockbuster?? Anyway, it's not wrong if you like it, hun.
That's just called a 'fetish'. And that's one doosey of a
fetish, too, I might add. Of course most people don't swing from
that tree, so you're going to have to really look hard for a
dude that doesn't mind you're little turn on....
- The Man
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- My boyfriend (of four months)
got me a beautiful ring for Christmas (relax, it’s not an
engagement ring). He couldn’t wait to give it to me (he bought
it in October, but he waited until the other day to give it to
me). He also proceeded to tell me he loved me which he tells me
all the time… (that he’s “crazy” about me, etc.). I
haven’t yet been able to tell him that I love him too, because
I don’t know if I trust that what he or I feel for each other
is love. My question is: Do men just willfully toss around
proclamations of “love” such as this? My understanding was
that men regarded the word “love” as they would some sort of
horrific, infectious disease with the onslaught of sudden death
if the words were ever uttered from their mouths?? Help!
What’s your take on the situation?
- Ann, Age 32
Sounds like he really likes you.
- The Man
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- What can a man do to keep a
hard on more than 5 minutes? Is there a trick that may help? I
mean is there something you can eat? I have premature
ejaculation and I'm trying to get help. I love sex but I can't
go more than 5 min. without busting. Can you give any
suggestions?
- Theo, Age 30
There are exercises you can do. Also, try wearing a condom. See
a doctor for the best advice.
- The Man
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- I'm married to a 50 year old
man I met on the internet. We've been married 2 years. He looks
at a lot of porn on the web, and I think it's excessive! He
tries to hide it from me, but I know how to check where he has
been and this is how I know he's been doing it a lot. I have
asked him to stop, and he will for a short time, but will start
up again soon after. Does this mean he is looking for someone
else and is tired of ME? He looks at amateur pictures in
websites. I'm a very attractive woman, and he's making me feel
very insecure. What should I do?? :-(
- Sandra
There's nothing you can do. Boys will be boys. Looking at porn
doesn't make him a cheater. Cheating makes him a cheater.
Looking at porn makes him just like a bunch of other guys. Not
looking at it with him makes you like a lot of other gals. Of
course, if you choose to look at it to, that would also make you
like a lot of other gals too. There is no right or wrong answer.
I say that if he wants to look at some stupid pictures, what's
the difference? What if he stopped at your request and all of a
sudden wasn't as turned on all the time. Then you'd have a
husband who didn't look at porn and no longer wanted to have sex
as frequently. Perhaps you're right, but then again perhaps you
should be careful what you wish for. Lots of girls get upset
when their men look at porn. I see it all the time in email from
women just like you. If I give you one piece of advice it would
be this - mellow out on the topic before your frustration ends
up doing something bad to your marriage that won't happen if you
just let him have his fun.
- The Man
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- If a guy gets aroused sexually
and doesn't come will he get blue balls? What is it and how does
it feel? Does this happen every time a guy doesn't ejaculate?
- Cindy, Age 20
I haven't had blue balls for a LOOOONG time. Thank god, too - it
hurts like hell. The first time I got it I had to walk up stairs
to get to bed. I looked like I'd been on a horse all day I was
walking so bow legged. Thank god everyone else was sleeping and
didn't get to see me walking like that! By the way, I did
actually have sex that first time I got blue balls. It was my
first sexual experience, so I guess it happens even when a guy
does get to come. Mainly it's an excitement thing. It happens to
young guys, not the older ones. After you've had sex a few times
you no longer get it.
- The Man
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- The first time a guy has sex is
it normal for it to be really fast? I'm talking like 1 or two
minutes fast.
- Heather, Age 18
Yep. I lasted just long enough my first time to - and that
was it. All over with before I knew it. If a 17 year old dude
tries to tell you he lasted his first time for anything longer
then 25 seconds, it's sure sign he's jerking you're chain.
- The Man
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